When you feel the practice getting stale & flat, just come back to yielding. And remember, true yielding is always from & to the heart – it is the heart breaking open to welcome in the Other.

You will find poetry nowhere unless
you bring some of it with you.
—Joseph Joubert

Poetry precedes prose
Always

The artist has no choice but to create. Their creativity is as primitive, basic & uncontrollabe as the sex drive. When it bursts free, in the act of creation, anything is possible, and what's created surprises the artist more than anyone.

A healthy psoas is juicy, supple, responsive.

—Liz Koch

When we let gravity take the body then we sink down and the knees break forward. When we let levity take our spirit then the eyes brighten and we look ahead & slightly up. Both gravity & levity take us forwards.

Culture is a poor substitute for Nature.

What we call learning
is only a process
of recollection
—Plato

To get stronger you must endure pain; whoever says otherwise is trying to sell you something.

Resist the herd

Traditionally in Taiji there are no grades or belts, just the appellation Master. My own teacher explained that it is usually bestowed after at least ten years of training, during which time the student has acquired enough knowledge, skill & charisma to successfully hold down a class of their own. Although he later confided in me that a Master is really someone whose spirit has been fully awakened by another qualified Master.

The Other is not an appetite but a generosity.

STAY WOKE

(root out fascism)

& remember:
the ultimate fascist is
not the petty tyrant
but the cruel Ego

Levity is felt as a gentle call, a tender lure.

A barely audible call to prayer.

I relax, open up, become porous: then levity enters  ↑  lifts me almost weightless.

The energy we work with is not qi. It is not in the body, travelling along meridians. It is a function of our relaxed engagement with two fields: the field of gravity from the Earth pulling the body downwards; and the field of levity from the Heavens (the space surrounding the Earth) pulling the spirit upwards. It is my quiet trusting mind that allows & encourages this delicate play upon my being.

The goal of life
is living in agreement
with nature
—Zeno of Citium

God, too, is a metaphor.
—John D Caputo

ਦੂਜਾ ਖੇਲੁ ਕਿਰ ਿਦਖਲਾਇਆ
Dūjā khel kar dikhlāiā
You have constructed & staged the play of duality

—Sri Guru Granth Sahib

When my daughter was small she once asked me: Dad, where do the stars go during the daytime?  I explained that they are still in the sky, it's just that the sun outshines them.  This is meditation. Entering the darkness, the quiet, and slowly growing accustomed to the silence, which, it becomes revealed, is brimming with energy.

Bound by thoughts, we depart from the real;
But sinking into a stupor is just as bad.

—Faith In Mind

I suspect that when Buddhists harp on about happiness they actually mean contentment.

(Happiness is that bright, fleeting feeling that comes with something good happening. Contentment is quieter and steadier. It’s the sense that things are okay as they are, even without anything special going on. You can be content without feeling happy, and you can be happy without being content.)

CENTRAL EQUILIBRIUM

The Divine Light tempered all qualities, so that they all stood with one another in a Love-Play.

—Jakob Böhme

(Das Göttliche Licht temperirte alle Eigenschaften, daß sie alle mit einander in einem Liebe=Spiel stunden.)

Seeing the bigger deeper picture
This is the work

The reason we're drawn to this work is because we've had experiences (usually quite young) of real intensity (if not awakening) that led us to suspect that the normal world inhabited by others is a dull dream compared to what has been revealed to us. Then, try as we might, we just cannot fall back to sleep. When we luckily meet a teacher that talks the language of this awakened world then we have no choice but to follow.

The Father uttered one Word; that Word is His Son, and he utters Him for ever in everlasting silence; and in silence the soul has to hear it.

—St. John of the Cross

Digging down to dredge something up
Reaching up to drag something down

A belief rooted in felt presence rather than evidence.

If you don't believe then you can only worry. It depends how you want to be in the world – joyously or anxiously.

The transition out of willing into Gelassenheit is what seems to me to be the genuine difficulty.
—Martin Heidegger

MEDITATION
Thinking nothing
Feeling everything

What distinguishes us moderns from the ancients is our neurotic need  to control all aspects of life. This is what drives our obsession with technology. Then our only response to things we can't control is worry & anxiety. Ancient man naturally trusted in his own spirit and as a consequence was continuously releasing (letting go) into the future. Heidegger calls this Gelassenheit (generally translated as releasement or letting-go-ness) and he assures us that it is the most pressing concern for modern man.

We lead our common lives, but all around there are hunches and intimations and whisperings of something else. These small, softly spoken suggestions are enough for me to feel that there is some enigmatic otherness to be experienced, and that’s where my belief lies.

—Nick Cave

a magical equilibrium

Wake up the tail.

(Not just the coccyx but the spine down from the ming men:  L3, L4, L5, S1, S2, & beyond.)

MEDITATION
Becoming placid
(serene & untroubled)

In the '60s & '70s John Cage kept a journal of anecdotes, observations & koanlike tales. He called it:

Diary: How to Improve the World
(You Will Only Make Matters Worse)

Heed the call of conscience. It's as close to God as most of us get.

Develop a new image of thought:
neither rational nor dogmatic
but intuitive & imaginative

Il faut être léger comme l’oiseau, et non comme la plume.

—Paul Valéry

Silence is an intimate thing. Most people don’t understand because the default mode is to surround oneself with noise.

When students ask me what spirit is I just say PIXIE DUST and then point them to the scene in Peter Pan where Peter teaches Wendy and the boys to fly (still my favourite scene from the movies – always makes me cry).

Spirit is the magic ingredient that makes the impossible possible. And, when you think about it, what could be more impossible than LIFE.

Love is a state that I would like to exist in continuously.

—Nick Cave

We live in a culture that constantly bombards us with one message: Money solves all problems. As we get older we begin to suspect that this message is largely false and that deep problems can only be solved with LOVE. This is why the culture endeavours to keep us infantile – safely locked in as cogs in the machine. The only way to break free is to quiet the mind & open the heart.

There's a story of an Indian master visiting England in the 1930s and meditating in a house that recently had electricity installed. Afterwards he commented that it would now be impossible for people to quieten their minds.

Spend as much time outdoors, away from electricity & electronic devices, as possible. And this includes smartphones.

Work out of your work.
Don't work out of anybody
else's work.

Art, for the most part, is about
concentration, solitude
& determination.
—Richard Serra

For me the most radical & revolutionary work one can engage with is the urgent task of quietening the mind. If your mind is not quiet then it is captured by the machine – the workings of culture & society – all designed to rob us of our real vitality for the sake of baubles.

A little sparrow on the eave drainpipe
My heart flutters

—Jack Kerouac

When the mind quietens & the heart opens (which it will in time) a whole new world opens up: a world of connexion & energy where literally everything sparkles with spirit. We call this world LOVE.

Technology
produces
a godless
world

Or rather
the machine
becomes
the god

Some have to go back
before they can
go forward

The Kingdom of God is that which appears when the mind quietens. And remember: there's quiet & there's quiet.

In most spiritual traditions, otherworldly experiences (visions, out-of-body, universal merging...) are frowned upon until the adept is humble enough for the experiences not to go to their head.

Ea est autem prima humilitas, secunda humilitas, tertia humilitas: et quoties interrogares, hoc dicerem; non quo alia non sint praecepta, quae dicantur, sed nisi humilitas omnia quaecumque bene facimus et praecesserit et comitetur et consecuta fuerit, et proposita quam intueamur, et apposita cui adhaereamus, et imposita qua reprimamur, iam nobis de aliquo bono facto gaudentibus totum extorquet de manu superbia.

That way is first humility, second humility, third humility; and as often as you ask me, I would say the same. Not that there are no other precepts that could be named, but unless humility precedes and accompanies and follows every good thing we do—set before us for us to gaze upon, set beside us for us to cling to, and set over us to restrain us—pride will snatch the whole of it from our hands the moment we begin to rejoice in some good deed.

—St. Augustine of Hippo, Letter 118 (to Dioscorus)

Meditation cannot be rushed – the more anxious you are (about time) the longer it takes to relax & quieten. So if you don't have time then find time or make time, otherwise you're just wasting time.

Stop activity

(quiet the mind)
Return to stillness

(mind in dantian)
And that stillness will be even more active

(heart opens)

Head builds Empire

Heart makes Soul

The eye should learn to listen before it looks.

—Robert Frank

FEEL IT!

As a teacher, this is the phrase I find myself repeating over & over.

What I really mean is: take it to heart rather than head – feel the tender ache of its truth – let it rip you apart or at least open – and definitely don't worry (about) it!

As my teacher once said, only half in jest: If you don't weep at the movies, you have no business being in my classes!

I am hoping to provide a space that visually & spatially
may help us remember or rediscover our inner selves,
our own individual thoughts, feelings & spirits.
—Stephen Antonakos

TRIUNE

Relax the body
Quiet the mind
Free the spirit

Earth
as sink
& source

My teacher used to say:

The most precious thing in the world is peace of mind, and anyone who tries to take it from you is your enemy...

And I always say:

The only thing we all have in common: we are all our own worst enemy...

If you have a noisy mind then
you definitely have
a tense jaw

To be happy is to love (your) life, & vice versa.

The thing we fear most
is nothing(ness)

The first stage to freeing the mind from the clutches of Ego is relaxing (into) the body. Content to be just another body amongst bodies. Traditionally the mind simply watches the breathing – this never-ending exchange with the environment.

But I aspire
downward

—Wendell Berry

As long as you don't get suckered in by the false promises of Empire, there's no reason why you won't continue on this journey until the day you die.

By far the largest part of the work is struggling to overcome our own resistance to the teaching. This is what Ego is: resistance to the teaching, whether that teaching is coming directly from a teacher or simply from life itself. And nobody can do this work for you: it is purely your responsibility, your private endeavour.

Repetition is never mechanical.
Repetition becomes possible by making it
better, newer and endlessly different.
That’s why great repetition is always fresh.
Likewise, our everyday life is not boring
because of the subtle differences.

The process matters.
Above all, encounters matter.
—Lee Ufan

If you're not grateful then you're resentful.
There's no neutral in this game.

for the love of god

Without, it's not humanly possible to sustain openness

The lies we tell ourselves
just to continue

The vehicle that's brought you to the mansion

must be abandoned to pass the threshold.

HOW TO BE A POET
               (to remind myself)


Make a place to sit down.
Sit down. Be quiet.
You must depend upon
affection, reading, knowledge,
skill—more of each
than you have—inspiration,
work, growing older, patience,
for patience joins time
to eternity. Any readers
who like your work,
doubt their judgment.

Breathe with unconditional breath
the unconditioned air.
Shun electric wire.
Communicate slowly. Live
a three-dimensioned life;
stay away from screens.
Stay away from anything
that obscures the place it is in.
There are no unsacred places;
there are only sacred places
and desecrated places.

Accept what comes from silence.
Make the best you can of it.
Of the little words that come
out of the silence, like prayers
prayed back to the one who prays,
make a poem that does not disturb
the silence from which it came.


—Wendell Berry

Consumer society only works when we all agree to consume far more than we need. So be radical (of the root) and consume the barest minimum.

My teacher, John Robert Kells, was told by his teacher, Chi Chiang-dao, that modern-day Taiji is less than 2% of what it once was.

mind continuous : continuous present
the present moment oozing through time
(amoebic movement)

I paint in order not to cry.
—Paul Klee

Everyone lies. Everyone has an agenda. This is why I only believe what my sensitivity tells me. What I feel.

Taiji is the art of concealing hardness with softness
—Yang Chengfu

(My favourite definition of Taiji)

The teacher intimates a deeper truth – telling tales of what awaits beneath the tension & the noise.

Civilisation enables & encourages us to drift through life without ever fully waking up.

For me, the most important principles in Taiji are the two we share with all other internal arts: Relaxation & Natural way Best way, and the one unique to Taiji: Turning / returning.

The essence of all beautiful art,
all great art, is gratitude.
—Friedrich Nietzsche

All that is, is light.

—Duns Scotus

The aim of spiritual work is the dissolution of the self. Unfortunately, the self is clever and will do all in its power to keep control, including turning spiritual work into the ultimate ego trip. This is why we must be constantly on guard. The first task, once we've become quiet inside, is to locate, feel & identity the Spirit – our Divine Spark. The work, from then on, serves this spark rather than self-interest, and such work is always humbling.

The word humble comes from the Latin humus, which means ground, earth, soil. To be humble is to be down to earth. You stay grounded and do not put yourself above others.

I've reached the moment where the movement of my thought interests me more than the thought itself.

—Pablo Picasso

This blog (such an ugly word) is a journal of sorts. An accrual of daily thoughts generated by the work. It is designed to help us out of the world and into the work – put us in the mood for practice, for love.

MEDITATION

lingering
in
stillness

I am thinking about the hand of the gardener.

What does it touch? It is a loving, waiting, patient hand.

It touches what is not there yet.

It guards the distance.

—Byung-Chul Han

YIELDING:
                      reaching forward from the back (rounded shoulders)
                      pulling back the front (hollow chest)

I choose to live off crumbs because I believe they mark a trail. The value of frugal.

Knowledge bolsters the Ego
Poetry feeds the Soul

empathy is a moral obligation

We've created a society full of elderly
but devoid of elders.

in the midst of silence

When the mind truly quietens, you have no choice but to face God, and you realise there's nothing more terrifying than silence.

That's the job of art:
to undo the logic of the world.
—Sean Scully

via negativa

everything is connected

nothing is locked

The teacher provides a concise set of principles which, when obeyed to the hilt, slowly wash us free of self, of sin.

The imperative of releasement

With our cherished freedom of choice, we design lives that make spiritual progress well-nigh impossible.

I spent nine years at university only to learn that if I wanted a real education I needed to look elsewhere.

We do not know what God is. God Himself does not know what He is because He is not anything. Literally God is not, because He transcends being.

—John Scotus Eriugena

A real teacher doesn't merely pass on knowledge or information, they turn on your spirit. This is the transmission.

We all know, deep down, that when we produce beauty – be it silence, art, simple kindness or natural order – then God is pleased.

Without the correct hardness (self-discipline) we're indulgent & infantile, and without the correct softness (a feeling for others) we're disconnected & selfish.

When the knife reaches bone,
your life must change.
—Rumi

The Human Touch

Athletes know that a great training session will be followed by muscle soreness the next day. Dancers have regular "zombie days" when they simply can't function and need to rest. Live performers take all sorts of drugs (alcohol being the most common) to ease the awful comedown after the gig. The same with us spiritual adepts – if you have a really effective meditation or prayer session then expect to feel wretched & unsettled – out of sorts – the next day.

Theology: thinking about God
Is this not (oxy)moronic?

When I started Taiji in the early eighties my teacher used to say that we study Taiji to gain an understanding of energy. He never explained what energy was. When you offer an explanation of something that the student is not qualified to understand, then they generally get the wrong end of the stick. Then thinking that they know holds them back. Some things (the important things) have to be found out for yourself.

G O D   I S   L O V E

I still think this the most remarkable statement ever uttered.  It clears up so much.  Meditation is simply time spent dwelling on this.

The only way to stay open
is to stay connected

If you waken one morning so wretchedly tired the body is numb and you can't imagine ever remembering how to arise, then you've pushed the spirit too far.  If, on finally arising, you can't lift the eyes to face the world and tears well up, then you've stretched the spirit too far.  Look long & hard at what you've done to cause this, and then, once you've recovered, do it again.

Change never goes the way you want.
If it did, it wouldn't be change.

MEDITATION
sit & watch
the roiling resentments
settle & clear

Life commences with a process of closing down – constructing an Ego. Then, if you're lucky, you grasp a lifeline – a teacher, a passion, a trauma, a work – and life becomes a long slow process of dismantling the Ego and opening back up.

The great sustainer is not a sense of self – this personal preserve – me & mine – Ego & Empire – but the love of God.

I don't know about you but my favourite meditation of the day is Vigils. Probably because it's so quiet & otherworldly.

I want my paintings to be:
abstract, direct, urban, basic, modest, pure,
simple, silent, honest, absolute.
—Alan Charlton

an attitude of gratitude

We are all culpable: we all consume far more than our fair share.

The teacher helps you slough your skins and become who you really are beneath all the conditioning, missteps and laziness. The work is always reductive.

When I was a kid, the priest's pulpit was commonly called the coward's castle.

Spirit expresses in the eyes & the tail.
Both need to be attended to,
especially the neglected tail.

Truth is whatever we're running from

All artwork is stored energy.
The art releases its power whenever a viewer
becomes a dreamer.
—Larry Bell

応 無 所 住 而 生 其 心
The mind arises without dwelling on anything.
—Musō Soseki (1275–1351)

The Taiji Form should be practised daily until it is part of you and there is little likelihood of ever abandoning it.  It then gives back so much – always reviving spirit & mood, and always generating new material – fresh insights to work with.

“Bum-in” gets the lower dantian directly under the heart.
“Chin-in” gets the upper dantian directly over the heart.

It's important to spend time each day with the three dantians vertically aligned so that Nature (Heaven & Earth – levity & gravity) can work on you.

On the Earth gently
In the world softly
With myself tenderly

Things are not difficult to make; what's difficult is putting yourself in the mood to make them.

—Constantin Brâncuși

Only a willingness to sacrifice
shows the student is serious

I remember my physics teacher at school telling us that toward the end of the nineteenth century scientists really thought they had everything sewn up - just a few loose ends but apart from that, done & dusted. And then Einstein came along and blew everything apart. I feel the same with the modern bourgeoisie - they think their lives pretty much sorted and that a little meditation class on Tuesday evening and things would be perfect. But if they really embraced the meditation (or the Taiji or the Yoga) then everything would change, not just the way they feel but their whole value system and world outlook.

Feel it rather than think it

We are all in the same boat. We are all asleep, avoiding the issue. The difference is one of intent.

“Stinking thinking” is the universal addiction.

—Richard Rohr

Too much of a good thing upsets the balance & eventually leads to depression. This should be obvious.

The sacred principle at the heart of bourgeois life is private property. Now we know that the bourgeoisie have everything topsy-turvy so the sacred principle at the heart of the spiritual life must be the commons – commonality – what we share, not just with each other but with all of life – what cannot be owned – S P I R I T !

The courage to remain open

Teacher as significant other

In this noisy overcrowded world,
the most precious commodity is
silence.

consistently
vulnerably
patiently
openly

The good teacher doesn't just give you exercises, forms, principles, insights.  She teaches you how to follow your nose.

One principle must make the universe a single complex living creature, one from all.

—Plotinus

Meditation: disappearing into the bigger picture

Back in the late eighties I taught a short introductory course at a classy gym in the Barbican.  I knew they already had judo, karate & taekwondo so I asked the director what they would like from me.  I'd like you to put the art back into martial art,  he replied.  Since then I've always thought of Taiji as an art, and myself as an artist.

not
obsessed
but
possessed

Don’t worry about cool,
make your own uncool.
—Sol LeWitt

Principle: an elemental aspect of a craft or discipline

to be conscious
is to love God

Perhaps the easiest way to become energetic (of energy) is to stand up, raise your heels & bend your knees.  To maintain balance in this posture you need two things: attention & spirit.  When you get these two together then you get energy.

The Daoist Fourfold:

EARTH    HEAVEN    MAN    DAO

Taiji celebrates a conscious working connexion with each element:

EARTH:  gravity, sinking sacrum, bent legs, humility;
HEAVEN:  levity, lifting sternum, light heart, joy;
MAN:  mortality, morality, yielding, spirit;
DAO:  yin/yang, energy, principle, the bigger picture.

This is also prayer.

Consistency is key

Bum-In is one of our treasured principles and one of the easiest to get wrong. It does not mean pulling your tail between your legs like a whipped cur. Imagine the master's hand on your sacrum, heel of the palm just beneath the mingmen (命門) and fingers pointing down the coccyx. The heel of the palm pushes down & forward, driving you deeper into the legs without altering the inclination of the sacrum, and also providing a subtle lift to the thymus (upper sternum). This is the stimulus that moves you forward.

I used to meditate until I learned to stop thinking.
—Agnes Martin

My paintings are about merging, about formlessness
A world without objects, without interruption

The miracle of the figure of eight is that it brings things together and keeps them apart at the same time.

We are born with baggage. The aim of spiritual work is to die lighter than we were at birth.

We've moved from wisdom to knowledge, and now we're moving from knowledge to information, and that information is so partial that we're creating incomplete human beings.

—Vandana Shiva

LET SPIRIT LEAD

A sincere empassioned engagement brings the work alive – spirit takes over. It seems you know what you're doing but far from it. Otherwise you'll soon get bored.    (Artists understand.)

solve et coagula

LIFE FEEDS ON LIFE

When I came across this phrase a lot fell into place. If we want to live a good life – one that generates goodness rather than one that merely consumes goods – then we absolutely need prayer (begging forgiveness), sacrifice (giving what we cannot afford to give), and other daily rituals of humiliation.

beware sclerosis

We're not trying to understand the mystery but deepen it through participation.

A sense of peace – relaxing into space

A sense of destiny – relaxing into time

We're not trying to solve puzzles or discover truths, absolute or otherwise, we're just trying to stay fresh & pliable.  Young at heart.

a presence of mind
a mind that heals
that makes things better
makes things right
energetic – lively
cheerful

From the Chinese perspective, emptiness is not, as one might suppose, something vague or nonexistent – it is dynamic & active. Linked with the idea of vital breaths and with the principle of the alternation of yin & yang, it is the preeminent site of transformation, the place where fullness can attain its whole measure.

—François Cheng

Relax sufficiently for your surfaces to bleed without losing their integrity.

Tropisms
Tendencies
Propensities

When, for whatever reason, I catch sight of myself in a mirror I get the shock of my life. Not because I've aged so much (I have) but because that image is so obviously not me. The creature looking out of those eyes is still the child – eager for, and amazed by, this strange adventure called Life.

My icons do not raise up the blessed savior in elaborate cathedrals. They are constructed concentrations celebrating barren rooms. They bring a limited light.

—Dan Flavin

relaxed yet not relaxed
tense but not tense

The closer we are to the point of failure, the more energy.
The further from that point, the more force.

What distinguishes the good student? They take things to heart. The head only comes in when they get disheartened.

error stems from the imposition of a priori categories

—Roch Charles Smith

The advanced student is often technically no better than many a talented beginner, she's just more full-time.

We subconsciously manipulate our world
to protect our tension (Ego)

Permanent vigil
(or as close as possible)

The poor student maintains a critical distance:
far too fearful to get close

What makes an event an event rather than just another occurrence is the presence of spirit.

Meditation: sitting quietly and letting gravity wash you clean. And what is it that washes away? Tension, self-image, Ego.

Just had one of those "Oh shit! I've been doing it wrong all these years" moments...

There are reveries so deep, reveries which help us descend so deeply within ourselves that they rid us of our history. They liberate us from our name. These solitudes of today return us to the original solitudes.

—Gaston Bachelard

Ego rules empire

I spent 9 years at university, earning various degrees & research posts. I left when I realised that I wasn't going to find wisdom there, only over-specialised experts. Imagine my delight & relief when I encountered my Taiji teacher. Suddenly someone who spoke to my heart rather than my head.

Privilege:
empty over empery
energy over force
fluid over solid
process over state

It's all in the touch. The contact. The connexion.

Touch is everything & everything touches.

The teacher tells stories not to relay a narrative but to illustrate, or better still evoke, spirit.

Simplicity & lightness
form & emptiness
have become the
focus of my
practice

This life is really about showing up and doing the work, day after day, especially when you don’t feel like it. The practice supports this continuity.

—Steingrímur Gauti

Spirit is an onslaught. All day we are being bombarded by spirit, imploring us to wake up and take notice. But 99.9999% of the time we remain slumbering self-engrossed idiots.

Energy connects
the real & imaginary
making things complex

Work in such a way that you are constantly re-discovering long lost secrets.

Learning to turn off autopilot.

(The work in a nutshell.)

Exploring Emptiness & Silence

A mind
conducive
to energy

In meditation practice, we neither hold the mind very tightly nor let it go completely. If we try to control the mind, then its energy will rebound back on us. If we let the mind go completely, then it will become very wild and chaotic. So we let the mind go, but at the same time there is some discipline involved. The techniques used in the Buddhist tradition are extremely simple. Awareness of bodily movement, breath, and one’s physical situation are techniques common to all traditions. The basic practice is to be present, right here. The goal is also the technique. Precisely being in this moment, neither suppressing nor wildly letting go, but being precisely aware of what you are. Breath, like bodily existence, is a neutral process which has no “spiritual” connotations. We simply become mindful of its natural functioning. This is called samatha practice.

—Chögyam Trungpa

Once, having a difficult time pushing hands with my teacher, he lost his patience and yelled:
—Don't let me stick to you!
—How do I do that? I asked feebly.
He paused then calmly replied:
—You need to change the way you live your life.

As we navigate life we gather maybe a handful of masters – life affirmers – whom we return to whenever we need to be reminded that we have a soul – that we are, first & foremost, creatures of spirit. These could be teachers, writers, artists, performers, friends & family even – people whom you can always count on for inspiration – the proverbial wake-up call.

Yin & Yang unite when the mind stops
This insight comes in flashes as you face fear
These flashes become a steady stream of light
You are truly blessed to know you have no choice
All is energy and everything is in its rightful place
I am with you out of time.

—John Kells

I have adapted this to use as a (silent) chant:

'Yin & 'Yang u'nite
'when the 'mind 'stops

'This 'insight 'flashes
'as you 'face 'fear

'These 'flashes be'come
a 'steady 'stream of 'light

'You are 'truly 'blest
to 'know you 'have no 'choice

'All is 'ener'gy
'in its 'rightful 'place

'I am 'with 'you
'out 'of 'time.

(Apostrophes precede a stressed syllable.)

Each line has three beats (triple time) or can be ended with an added silent beat to give common time. The first line of each verse is the in-breath and the second line the out-breath.

eschew a life
impoverished
by certitude

Montaigne puts not self-satisfied understanding but a consciousness astonished at itself at the core of human existence.

—Maurice Merleau-Ponty

We are hunters.
Hunting for spirit with spirit.

Work in such a way that action & passion are barely discernible.

always return with spirit

always return to spirit

on the edge
of your seat

THE JEWEL

There is this cave
In the air behind my body
That nobody is going to touch:
A cloister, a silence
Closing around a blossom of fire.
When I stand upright in the wind,
My bones turn to dark emeralds.


—James Wright

Eventually, after half a lifetime struggling away, you realise it's all vanity & folly, and you're going to fail (miserably, joyfully – it's your choice) but you continue anyway because it's the only way to live – heroically, selflessly, impeccably – catching occasional glimpses beyond the mundane world.

always alive
to the
possibility

The secret of life?
Never stop delving.

When mind stops thinking it becomes an energy we call awareness.

Following the introjection of external emotions (atmospheres), the world appears neutralised and tragically devoid of all that pathically “moves” human beings; on the other hand, the soul, thus closed-off, turns into a black box from which the five senses escape always only “on parole”, testifying the outside world in a weak way.

—Tonino Griffero

Force is directed by the will
Energy is sparked by spirit

Meditation is the most effective & reliable tool to regain equilibrium & composure.

She was slowly straying from that zone where things have a set shape and edges, where everything has a solid, immutable name. She was sinking deeper into the liquid, quiet, unfathomable region, where mists hung as vague and cool as those of the dawn.

—Clarice Lispector, Near to the Wild Heart

Mankind's greatest technological achievement was not the plough or the wheel or the clock or the computer but the Ego. To pull the mind into the head and separate it from Mind-at-large (creating subject & object) was a bold move akin to Lucifer's withdrawal from God (was this Adam's Fall from Grace?) and I'm sure when we first learned to do it it was a temporary useful stunt. The trouble is the world it enabled us to create is so intoxicating that we no longer know how to slip out of Ego and back into Mind-at-large.

Mind is not in the body
The body is in the mind

Working mindfully – slowly, deliberately, intentionally – frees mind, body, spirit for real spontaneity & speed. One of the many paradoxes of Taiji. (Musicians understand.)

When man discovered the mirror, he began to lose his soul.

—Émile Durkheim

Last week I gave an elderly gentleman a massage. His legs were very stiff so at one point I asked him to relax the left hip joint so that I could manipulate the leg. How do I do that? he asked. Just put your mind there, I suggested. He then asked, Is part of the brain down there? I chuckled and tried to explain that mind is not brain and neither is it thinking; it is simply awareness. Just try to be aware of the joint and the tension it contains. And surprisingly it worked.

the world we live in
is a revelation

walking

seeing

I do not search

I search for nothing

finding

—herman de vries

If a man from a previous civilization—an ancient Greek, let us say, or a Roman—suddenly appeared among present-day humanity, his first impressions would probably lead him to regard it as a race of magicians and demigods. But were he a Plato or a Marcus Aurelius and refused to be dazzled by the material wonders created by advanced technology, and were he to examine the human condition more carefully, his first impressions would give place to great dismay.

He would soon notice that, though man has acquired an impressive degree of power over nature, his knowledge of and control over his inner being is very limited. He would perceive that this modern “magician,” capable of descending to the bottom of the ocean and projecting himself to the moon, is largely ignorant of what is going on in the depths of his unconscious and is unable to reach up to the luminous superconscious levels, and to become aware of his true Self. This supposed demigod, controlling great electrical forces with a movement of the finger and flooding the air with sound and pictures for the entertainment of millions, would be seen to be incapable of dealing with his own emotions, impulses, and desires.

—Roberto Assagioli

Rationalisations:
lies we tell
to make ourselves
feel better

My teacher had a damning phrase for students who have yet to establish a daily practice regime: Not ready to begin. The real beginning is when you formally commit to a life dedicated to the teaching. The good student realises quite soon after starting their studies that this is their only chance and that everything else in life pales in comparison, including family and spousal commitments.

When I talk about mainstream culture, I am specifically referring to the “religion of science” (or dogmatic scientism), academic psychology (the cognitive-behavioral paradigm) – a New Age, Disneyfied doctrine (simplistic magical-positive thinking), traditional (monistic) religion, commercial media and social media culture (narcissistic histrionics or hypertransparency). In general, I am referring to all one-dimensional, mainstream thinking that flows from powerful organizations and the ways they wield power, all for their exclusive gain.

—Sergi Rufi

Break on through to the other side

Liang Tung-tsai, my teacher's first Chinese master, had a witty phrase for know-it-all students: Worse than a beginner. Yet in a way we are all worse than beginners because beginners really do have beginner's mind. So until we cultivate beginner's mind – the ability to repeat an exercise with the same enthusiasm and attention we gave it when we first learned it – then we too are worse than a beginner.

To all of us, I believe, in the middle of the twentieth century, the Roman Empire is like a mirror in which we see reflected the brutal, vulgar, powerful yet despairing image of our technological civilization, an imperium which now covers the entire globe, for all nations, capitalist, socialist, and communist, are united in their worship of mass, technique and temporal power. What fascinates and terrifies us about the Roman Empire is not that it finally went smash but that, away from the start, it managed to last for four centuries without creativity, warmth or hope.

—W. H. Auden, 1952

By all means think, but in images not words. Words are abstractions. The word tree is not a tree, and neither does it evoke a tree. Thinking in images is effectively imagining – developing the imagination.

Quiet mind
Empty mind
No mind

The teaching constitutes an attack on the Ego. Without persistent, concerted practice you will develop resistance to that attack and then the teaching won't be able to penetrate – you will effectively have become a poor student.

Depression is the result of turning a blind eye
(Eventually the past catches up with you)

The first book of Thus Spoke Zarathustra begins with the story of three metamorphoses: “How the spirit becomes camel, the camel becomes lion, and how finally the lion becomes child.” The camel is the animal who carries: he carries the weight of established values, the burdens of education, morality, and culture. He carries them into the desert, where he turns into a lion; the lion destroys statues, tramples burdens, and leads the critique of all established values. Finally, the lion must become child, that is, he who represents play and a new beginning, creator of new values and new principles of evaluation.

According to Nietzsche, these three metamorphoses designate, among other things, the different moments of his work, as well as the stages of his life and health. These divisions are no doubt arbitrary: the lion is present in the camel; the child is in the lion; and in the child, there is already the tragic outcome.

—Gilles Deleuze, Nietzsche, 1965, included as final chapter in Pure Immanence, 2001

What do all civilisations have in common?

Unsustainability.

Anything worthwhile has a price & a risk

I've yet to meet a therapist capable of turning the therapeutic spotlight back on themselves. Yet without this the life is one of pure pretence.

The search for an equilibrium is essential for the artist, to be as aware of inner space as he is of outer space.

—Mark Tobey

Content is a glimpse

—Willem de Kooning

Unless you let gravity flow through you it will be a pall dragging you down.

When you make spiritual progress, the body, which always lags behind, often injures. Its way of saying: "Wait for me!" Just be patient and resist fearing you've done something wrong. Eventually, the chances are, one such injury will be the death of you. So be it. This is why those on a spiritual path don't make old old bones.

Refuse to be an accomplice.

—Simone Weil

an inner discipline : a search for truth

Clearly distinguish body, mind & spirit. Gravity pulls the body down. Levity lifts the spirit(s). Selfless attention expands the mind until mind is simply the space you operate within – the boundless field of consciousness. Thoughts & feelings are fleeting tightenings of mind within mind. They come & they go. When they linger too long you have obsession, indulgence, worry & narcissism.

To think about God is to the human soul what breathing is to the human body.

—Jacob Needleman

Practice stale & tedious?

Try reversing your circuits.

Often a change is as good as a rest.

Never stew in your own juices
(Selfyeast of spirit a dull dough sours)

When you move into a front-foot posture, imagine the master's hand on your sacrum, gently easing it forward & down. Then feel the thymus (upper sternum) reaching up & out.

All fear reduces to fear of death
All love aspires to love of God

A heavy heart will tip the body forward and then the bum will stick out (the cardinal sin of Taiji). A head full of worries (thoughts unrelated to the immediate situation) will do the same.

stones

water

mud

hands

days

symmetry

gravity

wellbeing
independence
opportunism
freedom
dreaming
happenstance

Once, feeling frustrated with my own stupidity – my inability to grasp the ungraspable – I asked my teacher what it was that he was really teaching, because it obviously wasn't Taiji. He said: I'm teaching weak men to survive strong women. He never could resist a dig…

Shaking is your long-lost home.

—Lawrence Shainberg

Energy tends to be a blanket term for anything that can't be understood or shouldn't be understood or will be ruined by any attempt to be understood.

B R E A T H I N G
Pull yourself together
Let yourself go
Repeat

The dantian is a door to the deep unconscious.

Solitude & silence are necessary before it will open.

Then it's like gazing into a restless volcano.

Fascism arises when opinion is taken as truth.

a shiver of silence up the spine

Transformation is a wounding;
a shedding of what went before it.

—Autumn Richardson

Language keeps us safe in the known world. If you have a desire to venture into the unknown then you will need inner silence.

Don't fall victim to your own nobility – develop a ruthless streak. Liang called it enlightened self-interest.

Happy the way things are

silence & insight

God breaks the heart again & again & again until it stays open.

—Hazrat Inayat Khan

When you find your true home you realise you've been living in exile.

The struggle with internal work is to stop struggling

The greatest menace to our capacity for contemplation is the incessant fabrication of tawdry empty stimuli which kill the receptivity of the soul.

—Josef Pieper

The imagination is a wellspring of images that bubble up from the unconscious when the surface language-drenched mind stops.

Yielding brings energy in from outside
& attack sends energy out from inside

both
quiet
&
intense

Softness dissolves boundaries

In cogitation the thought or attention flits aimlessly about the subject. In meditation it circles round it, that is, it views it systematically, from all sides, gaining perspective. In contemplation it radiates from a centre, that is, as light from the sun it reaches out in an infinite number of ways to things that are related to or dependent on it.

—Ezra Pound, 1909, recalling in his own words ideas from Richard of St. Victor

When I really see the Other
then I see the world
through their
eyes

Yin & Yang are one vital force – the primordial aura.

—Wang Yangming

Forgiveness frees me from the past whilst grace allows me into the future.

The present moment is where forgiveness & grace become one.

The Master is free of four things: He doesn’t have preconceived ideas or foregone conclusions, he isn’t overly certain of himself, he isn’t unyielding, and he isn’t self-centered.

—Kǒngzǐ

Abnegating to the point of erasure

If you're not uncomfortable on a daily basis, you're not making much progress.

—Robin Sharma

If you're in the habit of pleasing yourself, you'll learn nothing.

The good student understands that the teaching's disclosure depends far more on their preparation & receptivity than the teacher's willingness to teach.